I've always completely, and entirely, hated everything about school. The strange part is- I'm smart, I have a 4.0, and I love to learn... But I HATE school.
I can't even identify what it is I hate about it, aside from doing the work and studying (I know, I know.). I've just always hated the institutional arrangement of academia.
I really want to stop hating it, because it depresses me. I'm in college right now, a freshman, and I'm currently taking a few gen eds, and my major courses. Now I know what you're going to say- Switch your major, or it will get better when Gen Eds are over with. But the thing is, it's not the material, it's school.
It makes me feel like I should be DOING something. I'm stuck in my hometown, in a shit hole state. I can't go out of state for college because tuition is too high, and my parents make enough to where I can't get financial aid.. Even though I would need it to go away.
When I'm enrolled in classes, I have this "I'm stuck here until I graduate" feeling. And once I graduate, I know Grad School is to come. Sometimes I just want to leave school and everything, move to Los Angeles, and work and LIVE for once. I feel the monotony here on a day to day basis, and everything just feels so stifled.
I know my University is the right choice for me now, and the thing is, I wouldn't be happy at any college or school- I know this about myself. How can I just suck this up, and deal with it!?
Hanging with friends never helps. I'm just so ANTSY to move, and to leave it all! And a bit angsty ;]. I just have this: I Need to get out and experience the world feeling, but knowing I can't, kills me.
Can anyone relate to any of this? Has anyone gone through this, or am I completely alone here?
I can't even identify what it is I hate about it, aside from doing the work and studying (I know, I know.). I've just always hated the institutional arrangement of academia.
I really want to stop hating it, because it depresses me. I'm in college right now, a freshman, and I'm currently taking a few gen eds, and my major courses. Now I know what you're going to say- Switch your major, or it will get better when Gen Eds are over with. But the thing is, it's not the material, it's school.
It makes me feel like I should be DOING something. I'm stuck in my hometown, in a shit hole state. I can't go out of state for college because tuition is too high, and my parents make enough to where I can't get financial aid.. Even though I would need it to go away.
When I'm enrolled in classes, I have this "I'm stuck here until I graduate" feeling. And once I graduate, I know Grad School is to come. Sometimes I just want to leave school and everything, move to Los Angeles, and work and LIVE for once. I feel the monotony here on a day to day basis, and everything just feels so stifled.
I know my University is the right choice for me now, and the thing is, I wouldn't be happy at any college or school- I know this about myself. How can I just suck this up, and deal with it!?
Hanging with friends never helps. I'm just so ANTSY to move, and to leave it all! And a bit angsty ;]. I just have this: I Need to get out and experience the world feeling, but knowing I can't, kills me.
Can anyone relate to any of this? Has anyone gone through this, or am I completely alone here?