Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years and we both really love each other. I have insecurity at times, selfishness and also major jealousy. All of my boyfriend's friend are girls for some odd reason and one his friend that is a girl is very important to him that he care alot. I just cant seem to accept this fact I know he has the right to have friends that are girls but it bothers me so much i dont know why. i do trust him that he wont flirt with her or cheat on me with her but it still drives me crazy! I feel major jealousy expencially to this girl that is important to him because couple years ago when we first gone out he told me how hawt she was and talked about her alot and hang out with her all the time when i am not around. They are close friends and so important to him which bothers me more...he has other girl friends but i dont worry much about them. However, he told me all his other friends that are girls ARE NOT improtant to him but this girl is.. why is that?? why just this girl? does she have something special that he like?? i dont understand...I dont want to take his life or his friend away from me but to be honest i kind of do when it comes to a pretty girl that he care for...I probably seem so evil right now...anyways..I told him all my feelings out and even told him how jealous i felt with all details and he told me dont be that i am more improtant than her and that she is just a really important good friend. He told me to trust him. But im scared to trust because im afraid of that trust being broken in the future I know this is my problem that needs to be fixed.. i am trying hard to though but it doenst come easy as he broke trust couple times in the past before.. But anyways.. i feel soo jealous i cant control it then i get really upset depresed..I dont want to be like this i wish i took things more easier.. eventually he got mad when i still wasnt feeling comfortable after he said all that. The fact that he cant leave that improtant friend that is a girl for his girlfriend bothers me it make me wonder.. does he not love me enough to do that? Because if it was the othr way around i would be able to do that for him because he means so much to me.But i dont know why he cant? Yes i admit i want all the attentions from him and wish he only looked at me and not other girls when he talk to other girls my heart jumps and i get so insecured scared and it bother me crazy with jealousy. I know jealousy is a really bad thing but i cant help it i dont know what to do.. Please someone give me a really good advice that would help me. This is making me have a difficult time and also to my boyfriend.. im scared this will make relationship bad.. im scared that he will start hiding things from me because of this behavior of mine. Thanks! Also i cant even sleep because of this.. i know its so stupid... i dont know whats wrong with me.. : ( Even if i just have dreams or images that pop out in my head of him with another girl.. it makes my heart ache so much and i get so upset.. And i also really dont understand why this girl so important to him and why he care so much.. why he only close to friends that are girls.. i know his not the flriting time though.. theres so many questions.. im just so lost.. i really.. need...help...maybe i got issues or problems..