What my boyfriend does - this may get a little personal but I have the same problem - is beforehand, as foreplay, just have him put one finger in and then work another in and as desired. Some women just have to be a little stretched out prior to the sexing. My guy says if he doesn't do it, it kind of hurts him too. Run that by 'im. It could help. Good luck, it really is a lovely experience and can feel good once you get used to it. :]<3