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can I tell? I am 44 my husband is 50 we have been married for 28 years he has lost all interest in me sexually. When I come on to him he says I have issues or he just cant too tired. I know he masturbates alot in shower and he knows I now have toys. If and when we do have intercourse it is a quickie and very unpleasurable for me. I have tried talking to him and even leaving notes and that has caused huge fights. Should I just look for a lawyer and get out or is this something men go thru. Could he be having a affair (I have been told I am not allowed around his work or even in the same town as his work) Why I don't understand. Please help