browneyedbeauty
New member
first of all before i got married i was a pretty open minded person who was not a bit jealous of anything. i got married to a douchebag (it was arranged). i gave my heart to hiim thinking he was a sweety guy who loved me. but i started feeling he was not into me as much as i was intohim. so i find out that he was watching porn all the time behind my back but even that was ok with me, the thing that i was not cool with was that he would not be cool if i was even thinking abt watching porn behind his back and being a hypocrite he would probably leave me if he ever found out that i had those kind of feeling for even somebody on computer. So i guess when i actually show him that i know he is watching it, he was extremely sorry that he made me feel like shit. i guess he was playing games. so we had a baby and he was supposed to change but i guess he doesnt need to.HE started avoiding sex with me and was again watching porn behind my back, i mean he would not have se'x with me prolly once a month or twice a month. i confronted him and he came clean. he said he is mental thats why he is like that. i am sick of this shit. he uses his excuses . i do know that he like blonde chicks with big boobs. while i am a olive skin slender girl with everything average. Now i am so jealous that we go to market and i can feel him trying to get a look at some hot girl behind my back, makes me wanna kill him. he did this to me. i ask him wat was wrong with me that he didn;t even wanna fuk me and was rather masturbating to porn. he just goes quiet. i want to cry.i am tired of him making me feel like shit. i am actually starting to hate him. i know he wants to stay with me for just better life. i am a good mother, good cook and take care of everybody's needs and he knows he wont be able to find all those qualities in some hot chicks with big boobs. i am by all means pretty since i get hit on plenty. but it doesnt matter since i have a fucked up life. WHAT shuld i do. he wants me to act happy so he can be happy if i dont talk to him or just feel sad abt life in general he manipulates the situation by not eating dinner or just laying in bed until i go close to him. i fake being nice to him, i know he thought he can just keep doing this to me.I mean i dont want to be nice to him. i feel angry all the time and embarrased that i am still here but i have no choice.how can i let him know it is not ok with me to make me feel like dirt. what can i do pleeeeeeeeaseeeeeeeeeee advice me.how can i do that without leaving same house