J
Jean Phillipe
Guest
“The task has been explained to you, and no questions you have. Even as he said this, he crept up closer and closer to me. And as the words, “Do not fail me,” crept out of his mouth, he was behind me; his piercing eyes stabbing my heart with ice cold fear. His breath, which was burdened with a stench of evil, laid heavily in the air. I turned my head, trying to avoid the assertive look he gave to me.
“I will try, I will try my hardest,” I stated, with an impassive voice, void of all emotion.
“Trying, is not succeeding now, is it.” His tone of voice was drastically going for the worse. I knew I had to stop getting him mad for my own safety, but my mind told me to keep on insisting in my favor.
“No, but if you stopped pressuring me, I am sure I would be able to...” I could say no more. With the wave of his hand, and a scream of inaudible words, all was still. It was as if time had stopped. And, of course, it had. It had stopped for everyone, except him. Then, with a mere snap of his
fingers, everything vanished.
Its okay if you dont get the plot, im not even completely sure about it, i just write and see if it works, but im more worried about details, grammar, etc.. and btw i am aware that the first sentence or so is inverted
“The task has been explained to you, and no questions you have. Even as he said this, he crept up closer and closer to me. And as the words, “Do not fail me,” crept out of his mouth, he was behind me. The room was dark, not a single light to be seen. The only thing I could see were his piercing eyes, eyes that stabbed my heart with ice cold fear. His breath, which was burdened with a stench of evil, laid heavily in the air. I turned my head, trying to avoid the assertive look he gave to me.
“I will try, I will try my hardest,” I stated, with an impassive voice, void of all emotion. The task itself was hard enough. But the thing that worried me was him. He was death itself. The fear he instilled upon me was great. Unfortunately, once he called for me, I could never resist.
That is all of the information i had changed, or added to ,, i tried to get in some more details like one of my answers said. Btw the sex of the main character im not sure of yet, as im still trying to decide
btw please no one steal this from me, Im proud of it and it might get me somewhere
“I will try, I will try my hardest,” I stated, with an impassive voice, void of all emotion.
“Trying, is not succeeding now, is it.” His tone of voice was drastically going for the worse. I knew I had to stop getting him mad for my own safety, but my mind told me to keep on insisting in my favor.
“No, but if you stopped pressuring me, I am sure I would be able to...” I could say no more. With the wave of his hand, and a scream of inaudible words, all was still. It was as if time had stopped. And, of course, it had. It had stopped for everyone, except him. Then, with a mere snap of his
fingers, everything vanished.
Its okay if you dont get the plot, im not even completely sure about it, i just write and see if it works, but im more worried about details, grammar, etc.. and btw i am aware that the first sentence or so is inverted
“The task has been explained to you, and no questions you have. Even as he said this, he crept up closer and closer to me. And as the words, “Do not fail me,” crept out of his mouth, he was behind me. The room was dark, not a single light to be seen. The only thing I could see were his piercing eyes, eyes that stabbed my heart with ice cold fear. His breath, which was burdened with a stench of evil, laid heavily in the air. I turned my head, trying to avoid the assertive look he gave to me.
“I will try, I will try my hardest,” I stated, with an impassive voice, void of all emotion. The task itself was hard enough. But the thing that worried me was him. He was death itself. The fear he instilled upon me was great. Unfortunately, once he called for me, I could never resist.
That is all of the information i had changed, or added to ,, i tried to get in some more details like one of my answers said. Btw the sex of the main character im not sure of yet, as im still trying to decide
btw please no one steal this from me, Im proud of it and it might get me somewhere