how do i get over my fear of taking klonopin and xanax

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lostinspace99

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If anyone can help me - please do. I am a mess - frantic, constant rolling severe panic attacks, can't sleep, can't eat (literally - i've lost so much weight in one month its downright scary), can barely leave my room, can't do anything. About a 5-6 weeks ago we started the adoption of a child - something I have wanted and wanted - but every week we got closer to the baby coming home I started to freak out more and more to the point my husband didn't think it would work (very understandably) and called it off. Since then (Monday) its only gotten worse as now I can't stop panicking about messing everything up and not having a child when before all I did was panick about not being able to handle a newborn and all the stress. I am on Lexapro (have been for years) but not sure that is working anymore but in the meantime my doctor prescribed xanax these past couple weeks. As part of my anxiety I'm such a hypochondriac I'm terrified of taking anything. I literally can barely get it down my throat and then if I do I freak out imaging all the bad things it is doing to me. For xanax first I thought it was causing my throat to swell and then after I got past that fear after a day or two I feel like it was making my heart pound about 15 minutes after I took it and I was in a cold sweat. Now they want me to try klonopin that I've literally been staring at for 3 hours now and can't take it. I'm a total mess. I know if I can't figure this out here they will soon want to hospitalize me which is a whole other terror induces thought for me. Please help. any advice is appreciated.
 
they won't hospitalize you no insurance company would OK it and

not taking xanax or K is a good thing.

these drugs may help short term but long term they will likely be very harmful

good luck
 
Force your self to take one, and it would likely break a vicious corcle of tension and fear.....taken for a few weeks, benzodiazepines are safe and usefull..... try not to take them every day long term unless nothing else works.

A higher dose of Celexa might help (in panic disorder, you can push the dose to 80mg per day)
 
I am going through the same thing as you are now. I am in the middle of changing antidepressants and my panic is out of control. I usually use Ativan but it is not long lasting enough so I have been using Klonopin. It will help you get a long night's sleep. I've noticed that I have to use a full milligram though because anything less is not enough since the panic is so bad. If you have problems swallowing, just chew it up. It doesn't taste bad.

I have to ask, how long have you been on Lexapro and at what dose? Has it worked in the past? I need to find a good med to get a handle on my panic because it has been two months and I have lost so much weight and can barely function. I have a job and a family to take care of and I really feel I am just not coping. I am so scared of not finding a med to stop this. I just can't do it on my own.
 
sandyf - I was on 15mg of lexapro - now moved up to 20mg in the last month. I think its been almost two years I've been on this. I noticed some issues (random panic attacks) about 4-5 months ago but just took it as a bad period (husband layed off work for a couple months etc). However now i'm in full blown panic all the time and I can't take much more. I wake up every morning in such panic I just want...well you know. And yes I have a job that I just had to take a leave of abscence and trying to hide this from my son is unbearable. I can't seem to shake the panic and beating myself up for messing up the adoption.

This is my 3rd anti-depressant over my life. I think zoloft might have worked better for me anxiety wise but it had its share of side effects for me which is why I finally tried the switch from zoloft.

I'm so phobic about taking drugs its ridiculous and no one understanRAB since I need them so much and it would be the thing that might help. I don't understand it either. It's like I think they are going to kill me or something even though half the time I want it all to end a the same time - as I said i'm a comlete mess right now. I literally (or my husband) has to stand there and force me to take them and then can only do it some chunks as someone recommended.
 
I totally understand how you feel regarding the adoption. I imagine you feel so defeated as you feel that if you didn't have this disorder, it would have been a happy event. But I have always been a believer in things happen for a reason. I try to trust that God knows best although sometimes it's hard because we don't get what we want and we want to know why. You just have to trust. Another opportunity may present itself if it's meant to be. It's so discouraging though. How old is your son? I used to try to hide my problems from my kiRAB because I never wanted them to think their mom had a "problem". But now they are older and it's just to hard to do. I feel so guilty because I am not giving them the attention that I always have. They know that I have a condition but they haven't seen how bad I suffer because I try to go on with my daily functions as best as I can. It really is torture though as all I want to do is just hide in my room and escape life. I have never felt this bad since the disorder first started. It's not like an illness that you know will get better. It mentally feels like you're going to be this way for life. but we have been better before and others have gone through these episodes and pulled through so we just have to believe and be patient.
 
I have suffered anxiety and depression since I was 35 years old. I currently take 90 mg. of Cyrabalta and 20mg of pexeva. To sleep I take 20 mg of Klonapin and for the most part I do pretty well and most of my siblings have the same mental Illness. I have held down a great job since I Was 18. My Doctor say's it is all related to a Family gene and I will always have this mental illness. You can not get over this illness without taking medications. I tried several times and the results were bad. Face reality and realize that it is not your fault and it is chemical related.
 
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