Lately I've been feeling really stressed and confused. Not to mention crazy. I've been having mood swings like crazy. One minute I'll be happy and bouncy and the other minute, I'm suffering with feelings of inadequacy and loneliness. Now where do I start?
I'm fourteen and I don't live with my parents. They live on an island separate from mines. I've lived with them for most of my life and it wasn't till a year ago that I moved away. I moved because the year after that, we'd moved to another island. I'm relatively fair skinned and the people there were darker than me and my family. In school I endured racist comments and teasing and bullying until I couldn't take it anymore.
After I left that place, I moved to my mother's home town and I began to live with my grandparents. Things were good and everything. Now this year, I'm beginning to get depressed.
First of all, I feel lonely within my home. I have my uncle and his wife and aunt who live nearby and they visit a lot. I never liked my aunt and I really don't like her daughter. I know I'm being petty by loathing a child but I really can't stand her. My other uncle and aunt are pretty okay and they have a son of their own. Living with my parents i never had to feel lonely because I had my brothers and sister plus my very supportive parents. I'm really missing them now.
My family here are my extended family and I'm missing the warmth and love of my nuclear family. I feel so left out when everyone is here and my cousins have their parents with them.
Another thing, is that I cut my hair this summer. It's really curly and short and I'm a girl. My grandmother and aunt are true believers in chemically relaxing hair. Every time my grammy sees my hair she starts rowing and talking about how I NEED to perm my hair. I absolutely refuse though. My aunt isn't any better. She agrees with my grandmother but on top of that, she's a moocher.
She comes by and 'borrows' my stuff and I never see them again. It's infuriating! Also, every time we have a break from school, she dumps her daughter on me. I'm really missing my siblings who can do things for themselves instead of acting all stuck up and whiny like my cousin.
I miss being able to talk to my parents about all my problems but now their all too busy to find the chance to talk to me. Our phone here is locked from being able to call over seas and I usually have to call them on my cell phone and have them call me. About a month ago my cell phone broke though and my parents have yet to call me.
I'm spending my days in my room struggling with religious problems and studying and reading and crying and no one pays any mind to me. I may just be an attention hog but I feel neglected and I don't know what to do about my killer mood swings and my rapidly declining happiness.
I'm fourteen and I don't live with my parents. They live on an island separate from mines. I've lived with them for most of my life and it wasn't till a year ago that I moved away. I moved because the year after that, we'd moved to another island. I'm relatively fair skinned and the people there were darker than me and my family. In school I endured racist comments and teasing and bullying until I couldn't take it anymore.
After I left that place, I moved to my mother's home town and I began to live with my grandparents. Things were good and everything. Now this year, I'm beginning to get depressed.
First of all, I feel lonely within my home. I have my uncle and his wife and aunt who live nearby and they visit a lot. I never liked my aunt and I really don't like her daughter. I know I'm being petty by loathing a child but I really can't stand her. My other uncle and aunt are pretty okay and they have a son of their own. Living with my parents i never had to feel lonely because I had my brothers and sister plus my very supportive parents. I'm really missing them now.
My family here are my extended family and I'm missing the warmth and love of my nuclear family. I feel so left out when everyone is here and my cousins have their parents with them.
Another thing, is that I cut my hair this summer. It's really curly and short and I'm a girl. My grandmother and aunt are true believers in chemically relaxing hair. Every time my grammy sees my hair she starts rowing and talking about how I NEED to perm my hair. I absolutely refuse though. My aunt isn't any better. She agrees with my grandmother but on top of that, she's a moocher.
She comes by and 'borrows' my stuff and I never see them again. It's infuriating! Also, every time we have a break from school, she dumps her daughter on me. I'm really missing my siblings who can do things for themselves instead of acting all stuck up and whiny like my cousin.
I miss being able to talk to my parents about all my problems but now their all too busy to find the chance to talk to me. Our phone here is locked from being able to call over seas and I usually have to call them on my cell phone and have them call me. About a month ago my cell phone broke though and my parents have yet to call me.
I'm spending my days in my room struggling with religious problems and studying and reading and crying and no one pays any mind to me. I may just be an attention hog but I feel neglected and I don't know what to do about my killer mood swings and my rapidly declining happiness.