How can I defend myself to my mother in law?

[Lee H.]

Each time my husband is upset with me, instead of letting me know, he talks to his mother about it. He tells her that he hates me, and wants out of our relationship. She will advise him to leave me, but then he will say no to her, never coming to me with the problem at all. So his mother dislikes me a lot, and called me asking me to leave him. She has encouraged him to go out on me, and introduces him to other women she would like him to be around. She and I are not getting along because of these things. He refuses to talk to me about any of it. The holidays will be a nightmare. What can I do? (besides leave him)

 

[Shaun and Nikolas's Mom.]

Do you two even want to be together? it sounds like your relationship NEEDS a lot of work.

You both need to start by talking.Let him know that if he has a problem, he cannot run to mommy with it.He needs to tell you.If you criticize him or anything when he does come to you, you need to stop.

Communication is key.You also need to (politely) tell his mother that the relationship between you two is exactly that, you two.It does not involve her.