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Emzie123
Guest
In English were studying Modern Poetry, and one of our sources was "Ted hughes" you may of known him from his poem " Tractor ", and our assignment is to create a poem like his, Ive decided to do a clock, and tell me what i can do to improve it, maybe personify it more or maybe more Similes, metaphors,Onomatopoeia's,Alliteration or Assonance. I don't mind abuse towards my poem as long as you say whats wrong with it and how i can change it...
So here it is, Title : Clock
The Clock stands there, like a general - watching me, looking at me through its hard frozen face, I look at it in hatrid!
Its cold,darkened weaved wood looked as if nails themselves torn through its hollow body, the details twisting and turning as if hell its self were a whirpool.
Its cold wooden heart ticked, as if it were dieing through every minute as its firm numb hands stretched to the twelfth hour.
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That's how far ive gotten up too. Btw im 13 so not going for GCSE Standard here, just some tips or some help in how i can improve.
Thanks
So here it is, Title : Clock
The Clock stands there, like a general - watching me, looking at me through its hard frozen face, I look at it in hatrid!
Its cold,darkened weaved wood looked as if nails themselves torn through its hollow body, the details twisting and turning as if hell its self were a whirpool.
Its cold wooden heart ticked, as if it were dieing through every minute as its firm numb hands stretched to the twelfth hour.
-----------------------------------------------------
That's how far ive gotten up too. Btw im 13 so not going for GCSE Standard here, just some tips or some help in how i can improve.
Thanks