My girlfriend's son keeps going into the fridge without permission (1st rule broken), unknowingly to us, eating candy (2nd rule broken), that is not his (3rd rule broken). This is recurring behavior which I tried to discipline him over before. My girlfriend is really not giving me the authority I feel I need to discipline him and she's not going to budge. She's basically chosen her mode of discipline over our relationship. I'll like to make the punishment way more unpleasant than having obeyed the rules in the first place. For instance, no going outside and hanging out with your friends and no TV for the rest of the day and part of the next day as well to remind him of his behavior and the consequences that could follow... He can continue to play with his toys, he can even continue to run around the apartment as long as he obeys my punishment/taking away of priviledges. If he opens the door and goes outside, then I put him in his room for an hour or so to remind him that things could get worse if he keeps misbehaving. Yup, that's my method of discipline.
My girlfriend's method basically consists of just putting him in time-out for an hour or so and then everything is hunky dory, the kid actually expressed to me that he thinks it was okay because he didn't eat them all, after the little time out she gives him, he actually thinks that he can go about his day with me as if everything is okay and he can just keep asking me for stuff as if I should care about his concerns. I tried to explain to him that what he did hurt my feelings, but it doesn't really seem to have much substance to it.
Any advice? Am I being unreasonable? How much so? Also, any comments on disciplining after the fact? For instance, why burden myself when he does something wrong? I'll punish him when it's convenient for me. Would that work as long as why he's being punished is explained?
Being that I live with them, am a father figure, and his behavior affects me, I feel I should have authority over parenting methods, especially when one method doesn't work.
My girlfriend's method basically consists of just putting him in time-out for an hour or so and then everything is hunky dory, the kid actually expressed to me that he thinks it was okay because he didn't eat them all, after the little time out she gives him, he actually thinks that he can go about his day with me as if everything is okay and he can just keep asking me for stuff as if I should care about his concerns. I tried to explain to him that what he did hurt my feelings, but it doesn't really seem to have much substance to it.
Any advice? Am I being unreasonable? How much so? Also, any comments on disciplining after the fact? For instance, why burden myself when he does something wrong? I'll punish him when it's convenient for me. Would that work as long as why he's being punished is explained?
Being that I live with them, am a father figure, and his behavior affects me, I feel I should have authority over parenting methods, especially when one method doesn't work.