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i feel.. idk.. i wake up to deal with this crazy family of mine. they all hate eachother and all just run around acting insane. im 14, im in 9th gtrade. schools whatever, i feel like people are just making me jump through hoops for them. my family is i guess you could say, messed up at the least. im sick of hiding it and acting like its ok. my aunt is a schitzophrenic in and out of the hospitol. my uncle goes under her rule my cousins are pretty broken on thie inside too.. my mom is a paranid freak. everything has a meaning no matter what i do i cant make her care, i think she loves me but in her own wierd way.. she has these crazy mood swings and i never know what to expect from her, sometimes i just hate them all i wish i could have a nice family like on tv that i can bring friends home to and no morre crazyness...anyways.. my brothers in jail. i hate my dad hes never been a "father" to me but he insists on harrassing me now because we are taking him to court... i like to drink alot. i like when im all fcked up and falling over i like that someone always takes time out of there day to watch me... does that make me wierd? or stupid? iv done alot of stupid things just because i wanted attention before :/ i feel worthless and ugly and stupid and weak and alone and i have noone to turn to.. am i crazy? for not wanting to live like this anymore? .. idk i feel all emo and stupid for writing this and putting it on the internet but i just want to tell SOMEONE..