Has anyone ever seen a leprechaun? The one in my closet may or may not be one.?

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earthling

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He's green but kind of slimy, and he only speaks French and some english but with a very thick accent. Are leprechauns all supposed to be irish? Also he likes to try on my tube tops and only eats jam which is causing an ant problem in my closet. My mother says he can't be a leprechaun because he won't eat lucky charms (the cereal) and my father thinks we should be institutionalized (my and my mother).
meant to say "me and my mother" or "my mother and I." the user below posted a ridiculous answer because my leprechaun (?) has not been munching me and I already stated that he only likes jam, he can't be lured out by a croissant and why would we want my father to hammer him? that's manslaughter. he gives me fashion advice and has only caused an ant problem and is actually quite friendly if he gets his jam every few hours. he is NOTa frenchman because he is 2 feet tall, totally green and has no french speaking ability and i still can't figure out if he is a leprechaun or not. serious replies only please.
 
He is not a leprechaun. He is just a dirty old Frenchmen muching off you. He is a transexual, thats why he likes your tube tops. Try to have your dad lure him out with a crousant, then smack him over the head with a hammer. This should get rid of him. If not declare war on him. He should immediately surrender if you do this and leave your closet.
 
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