terra_incognita
New member
I am taking a poetry writing class at a university. For this assignment, I had to write a poem that was one sentence long, using punctuation (commas, semi-colons, etc.) to keep it flowing. Now, here's the problem: I don't know what to title it! I was hoping that other people here could help me out. I appreciate general comments as well about the content. I am new to poetry writing but not creative writing in general, so constructive criticism is welcome.
"Flowers" (a working, generic title)
Someone brought flowers,
Left them on the porch
As an afterthought I suppose,
Depositing them on the overturned
‘Welcome’ mat leaving them to wither
Like a bouquet of daffodils on a grave;
I’m sure they were pretty once,
Before their petals curled up,
Coiled like conch shells vacant
Of the life that once resided in them;
And I wish I could have seen them
Before they turned to fragile decayed
Skeletons missing the outer layer;
And I wonder who you are,
You who left the once yellow but
Now brown flowers next to the
Piled up stacks of newspapers
That accumulated during my absence,
The pages bloated with water,
Discolored and splotched and unrecognizable;
And I wonder why you left these flowers,
Shrouded in crinkled green plastic,
Stems strangled with a rubber band
To keep them together;
Because there’s no card nor an attached note,
And nobody died recently, my birthday was
Months ago, so there’s no occasion for sympathy
Or congratulations or recognition;
I’ll never know who you are,
You’ll remain a mystery, in your anonymity,
And the flowers will be scattered in the yard,
But I wish I knew who you were
So that I could say thank you.
"Flowers" (a working, generic title)
Someone brought flowers,
Left them on the porch
As an afterthought I suppose,
Depositing them on the overturned
‘Welcome’ mat leaving them to wither
Like a bouquet of daffodils on a grave;
I’m sure they were pretty once,
Before their petals curled up,
Coiled like conch shells vacant
Of the life that once resided in them;
And I wish I could have seen them
Before they turned to fragile decayed
Skeletons missing the outer layer;
And I wonder who you are,
You who left the once yellow but
Now brown flowers next to the
Piled up stacks of newspapers
That accumulated during my absence,
The pages bloated with water,
Discolored and splotched and unrecognizable;
And I wonder why you left these flowers,
Shrouded in crinkled green plastic,
Stems strangled with a rubber band
To keep them together;
Because there’s no card nor an attached note,
And nobody died recently, my birthday was
Months ago, so there’s no occasion for sympathy
Or congratulations or recognition;
I’ll never know who you are,
You’ll remain a mystery, in your anonymity,
And the flowers will be scattered in the yard,
But I wish I knew who you were
So that I could say thank you.