touch again? My girfriend broke up with me 5 weeks ago saying that we had changed & that she was frustrated. She was having more of a social life with work mates & i was recovering from being very very ill for the past 8 months so could not go drinking/partying etc. She wanted a break but didn't know for how long. I never saw it coming at all! She wanted full freedom while on the break (but wanted to speak to me daily) but i said that was unfair on me as i'd be left hanging. She agreed & said she will think about it over the weekend.The next morning she was round mine & said she wanted to split. She said that she wanted to be friends with me as "i'm such a nice guy". I was pleading with her to stay with me but she didn't want any of it!
It was a massive blow & really hammered me badly! We were together for 9 years! We didn't marry as we got together when she was 17 & me 20 & circumstances didn't allow us (finance/university for 5 years/jobs etc). I had planned to buy a house with her & move in with her later this year but this fell on deaf ears!
Nobody cheated & i believe her when there is nobody else. 2 weeks later she text me to ask for her things. I brought them up to her that night & she looked upset but said that she didn't regret her decision!
I said bye to her mum & didn't argue at all!I put on a front that i was coping but i'm not at all!I think about her so much!
When i left she thanked me so nicely for bringing her stuff back. I said to feel free to say hi whenever you like & i will never blank her if we bump into each other (which will happen). She said to see how things go & to get on with our lives! That hurt me so so much!
I have not heard from her since (3 weeks ago)
Basically 1: Should i send a friendly text to say hi & how is she (in a non creepy way)?
2: Her friend split from her boyf that week that she split from me. Would that have played a part in her decision as she can go & enjoy single life too & spread her wings?
3: Her wanting to stay friends, was that to reduce the guilt, keep me in the background incase other guys don't work out or to have me around so that she can cure her curiosity about me whenever she likes?
4: How long does non contact work for?
5: Do you think she would be struggling with no contact & waiting for me to make the first move or not? & Do people get over someone fairly quickly?
Please don't say man up & just drop the woman etc as after 9 years i'm finding it bloody hard! By the way i am 29 & she is 26.
I would love to have her back! She has supported me in some very hard situations & the thought of not having her at all (even in a good friendly way) kills me! She knows that i appreciate what she has done for me!
Thanks for your help everyone.
It was a massive blow & really hammered me badly! We were together for 9 years! We didn't marry as we got together when she was 17 & me 20 & circumstances didn't allow us (finance/university for 5 years/jobs etc). I had planned to buy a house with her & move in with her later this year but this fell on deaf ears!
Nobody cheated & i believe her when there is nobody else. 2 weeks later she text me to ask for her things. I brought them up to her that night & she looked upset but said that she didn't regret her decision!
I said bye to her mum & didn't argue at all!I put on a front that i was coping but i'm not at all!I think about her so much!
When i left she thanked me so nicely for bringing her stuff back. I said to feel free to say hi whenever you like & i will never blank her if we bump into each other (which will happen). She said to see how things go & to get on with our lives! That hurt me so so much!
I have not heard from her since (3 weeks ago)
Basically 1: Should i send a friendly text to say hi & how is she (in a non creepy way)?
2: Her friend split from her boyf that week that she split from me. Would that have played a part in her decision as she can go & enjoy single life too & spread her wings?
3: Her wanting to stay friends, was that to reduce the guilt, keep me in the background incase other guys don't work out or to have me around so that she can cure her curiosity about me whenever she likes?
4: How long does non contact work for?
5: Do you think she would be struggling with no contact & waiting for me to make the first move or not? & Do people get over someone fairly quickly?
Please don't say man up & just drop the woman etc as after 9 years i'm finding it bloody hard! By the way i am 29 & she is 26.
I would love to have her back! She has supported me in some very hard situations & the thought of not having her at all (even in a good friendly way) kills me! She knows that i appreciate what she has done for me!
Thanks for your help everyone.