Generic emptiness

G

grmike29

New member
Maybe it's the time of year, maybe it's the first breakup, but I feel exceedingly worthless and unmotivated lately. For those of you who follow my little tale, I broke up with my first girlfriend about a month ago, after 15 months of happiness. I did it because I no longer felt affection, and felt like a worthless monster because I did nothing but make her happy. I was ripped up with guilty feelings, and I earned a reprise from those when I did it, but it was replaced with others just as bad. I'm adjusting to life with nothing but the motions of politeness and common talk between us, yet when everything in my life reminds me of her, it feels miserable.

Beyond these feelings, or maybe intertwined with them, is the feeling of contempt and disappointment for/with everybody I know. And I know, make new friends, but I can't think of a person without jumping to their negatives and vices. Since then, I've laid around the house, watched too much TV, and stared at the ceiling. I talked to my parents, and have decided therapy might be a good idea. Any insight?
 
First, stop being a woman about shit. First breakups are hard but you need to get over it. Try getting a job, do something to keep your mind occupied.

Second, try a rebound. Try getting some friends. Again, stop being a pansy. You are a man, and now's a good time to be one.

Stop obsessing over little shit and stop over-thinking stuff.

I'm not understanding how making her happy made you feel worthless. Isn't that the point of a relationship? That sounds like you didn't push her down the stairs enough...and if that's what relationships are about than I've been seriously misinformed. :tongue:
 
kinda what kich said... only less abusive...

Go bang some chicks... get your willy wet even if you have to pay for it.

Unless you plan on getting back with her... do something that makes her hate you so you have more reason to get over it.

Civility during the "get over it" phase only complicates matters. I would try to bone someone from a class or part of town that you feel you can't bone. That way it will be rewarding, challenging... and you'll be too busy thinking about the new tail you're chasing than to think about the tired old tail you just left.
 
Kich and Kr8or basically already stated my sentiments.

Look dude, there isn't a single piece of ass in the world worth getting this bent out of shape over. This exact situation is the reason that women outnumber men almost 2-1.

Go out, find yourself a one night stand or two just to get your mind off your ex and then from there find something productive to do to get yourself centered and back on a positive track.

Lift weights, read, learn to play an instrument. Do whatever you need to in order to make yourself feel human again, but for the love of god don't fucking dwell on something as miniscule as breaking up with ONE FUCKING FEMALE.

Life goes on, and you'll have other relationships. And you know what? They might fail too. But you know what you do then?

Exactly what you need to do this time: hang out with friends, go to strip clubs, fuck random girls, workout, learn to play an instrument... Do whatever the fuck you feel like doing except for bitching about this girl.
 
Personal experience talking? :tongue:

In addition to what everyone else has said:

Talk to a psychologist, you probably aren't clinically depressed, but some sort a shrink would probably do you some good. And if it turns out you do have long standing depression, don't be afraid to try some things, it took me years to admit to myself that I might have a problem.
 
I don't know why you'd feel so incredibly guilty for doing "the right thing." It would only hurt her in the end to keep trying to make her happy while you slide down a slope of personal misery.

But, like most people have said: It's best to just jump out there and get as busy as you can. Go have a good time with friends if you don't feel like trying for a relationship. There's so much you can do to keep yourself occupied, and I've got a feeling she'll move on.

Maybe you two will get together, maybe not. Don't worry so much about what could have been.
 
TRANSLATION: She probably isn't seeking advice from anonymous persons on the internet on how to deal with this breakup.

Hang in there, champ. If you think your first breakup is the hardest thing you're going to go through, you're in for a long and bumpy road down this journey we call life. It gets worse from here... Much, much worse.

But then sometimes it gets better. Yay.
 
I wasn't trying to assume that she was in any way better than him, lethal_lefty, but when he stated he felt guilty over leaving her while she was happy I figured I'd throw that in.

There are tons of fucking people out there, that's true. I doubt he's lacking confidence if he had the ability to end the relationship without a mess, so he's probably got no problems getting another gal.

I'll have to say that a rebound relationship makes those little leftover attachments disappear. Nothing like a new experience to rid of regrets.
 


Write your reply...
Back
Top