CC and everyone!
I am having a wonderful time on my weekend away. My mother brought her lap top with to the hotel so I could use it since she goes to sleep earlier than me.
I have missed you guys so freaking much! CC, I am so sorry so hear about your emotional struggles!!! Boy do I know the roller coaster ride of that. When an addict starts weaning down to quit.... it messes with your brain big time. This is normal unfortunetly. I obviously dont want to condone using ( I have used many many countless times so I am not judging) but I am very proud that in this whole week you have cut back so much. That in itself is a HUGE step and I am very proud of you for it. I know that you are having a hard time right now and I wish I was near you now to give you a great big hug and let you just cry on my shoulder. Sometimes everyone neeRAB to have a good cry. I have been praying for your strength.
I am doing pretty darn good. We are having a great time this weekend. I enjoy being with my Mother so much, we have so much fun together and she lifts my spirits always! HOWEVER......... I am freaking out because she has percocet with her.... 40 to be exact and I saw the bottle. It made me shake and I had to go to the bathroom and cry. So far, I have resisted. I am so scared though because I don't know if I will be able to be strong enough not to take any. Just knowing they are here is making me wild. I don't know what I am going to do or how I will find the strength but I am going to be honest.... I don't know if I will be able to control myself. That is why I was so thankful she brought the computer so I could log on and try to find some inspiration. Some strength....
Yes, I am worried about the PM issue because my boss will of course be checking my emails while I am gone and reading them... If he found out about this..... it would be terrible.
Just wanted to tell you that you are on my mind along with everyone else. I think I may start a new thread about my dilema.
Much love to you friend!
XOXOXOX
