T
tackyjan
Guest
Hello All. This is my first post.
[I didn't quite know where to post this because the subject spans multiple issues. Moderators, please feel free to move it where you deem appropriate.]
I am a 40 y.o. single Female. I live in San Diego, CA by myself in a condo with my kitty cat. Up until now my only real medical condition has been depression and asthma.
Over the last year or so my health has been deteriorating very rapidly.
I have pitting edema starting from around my knees down to my feet. The swelling is so bad that I cannot wear my shoes anymore and I have to step up to the next size.
I am also having a very hard time breathing and becoming short of breath after very minor activities (such as walking 100 ft). I have had to use my ProAir albuteral rescue inhaler way too much (20+ puRAB per day) and I always run out before I can refill the prescription.
I have also been very tired. I can easily (and do quite often) sleep the entire day. 1:00 AM till like 8:00 PM the next day no problem.
I must admit that I have gained a LOT of weight in the last year. This is mainly because of the lack of activity plus I have been eating only one meal a day and thats at around 11:00 PM where I run to the local fast food drive-thru and sometimes I will go to more than one! :dizzy:
I am very erabarrassed to talk about my weight but I need to get out of denial. So here goes. Last year at this time I weighed 210 lbs. Now I weigh 340 lbs and it just keeps increasing. Thats a BMI of like 47.
The extra weight has put so much strain on my joints, especially my back, that I am very sore and therefore constantly taking Advil.
The one "odd ball" thing that has been happening that doesn't seem to be related is my frequent urinating. I urinate least 10 times a day
Now here is some good news.
I went to a weight loss doctor here in San Diego. On my second visit he was concerned because my BMI went up (even though I have been on phentermine) and that I was having breathing difficulties. Before he would consider treating me (bypass surgery) he wanted to make sure that I was healthy enough so he referred me to a pulmonologist who also works in the Sleep Clinic.
The Pulmonary Doctor had me do 3 tests:
1. Echocardiogram
2. Pulmonary Function Test
3. Sleep Study
The echocardiogram showed NO problems with my heart (thank God!).
The Pulmonary Function Test showed no abnormal breathing issues other than my Asthma which we already knew I had.
The Sleep Study was a different story. He told me I had very bad Sleep Apnea and he prescribed for me a CPAP machine (pressure setting is 17 which I was told is very high so I must have pretty bad apnea). This machine actually helps me sleep at night I feel like I am getting more oxygen. My only complaint is the slight physical discomfort from wearing the facial mask.
So, my last visit with the pulmonologist was a bit strange because here I was complaining of severe breathing issues (which I do have, it really bothers me and I want to resolve it). I am telling the Dr. about my breathing issues but at the same time my test results have turned up "okay".
The pulmonologist next referred me to a cardiologist just to make sure and also to an asthma specialist to see if we can figure out if there is an external cause to my breathing difficulty. Those appointments are next week.
And that is where I stand.
One thing I would like to talk about, however, which complicates my situation a bit is I am very depressed. I have been hospitalized two times for suicidal ideation, the last visit was extremely severe to the point where I was given 6 treatments of ECT.
How does my depression relate to all this? Well, as I am sure you might have guessed being so overweight has a huge impact on my self esteem and my belief that happiness is no longer possible. I constantly think to myself that its all over. That turning 40 and gaining this weight is just a natural way of life and I cannot do anything about it. Well, if I was unable to be happy the first 40 years of my life I have NO IDEA how I am going to cope with the last 40.
So being as depressed as I am I don't leave the house to exercise. I just go to work and then come home and lie in bed.
I did buy a cheap stepper exercise machine that I started to use just to get my muscles some workout but I get very sore when I use it. It's like my leg muscles have completely atrophied.
I know I should be concerned but I don't know how to attack the problem. I cannot exercise outside because my depression keeps me indoors. I sleep all day on weekenRAB and evenings all other days.
I feel so damn stuck. I feel so damn confused. A lot of people look at obesity as the person's fault but I really feel like it has gotten the better of me and I have lost control. I wonder if I should go back to the psychiatric hospital and "fix" the mental issues which may help me get back outside and active again.
I feel like my doctors aren't on my side. They talk to me during appointments but I believe the medical doctors somehow think I am "making it all up" because of my mental history.
Please any advice, information, support, or just a friend would be so nice right now. I cannot let this continue the way it is because I believe that if I do suicide will feel like my only option. I don't want to do that because my Mother would not be able to handle it (we just lost my Dad last month).
Jan
[I didn't quite know where to post this because the subject spans multiple issues. Moderators, please feel free to move it where you deem appropriate.]
I am a 40 y.o. single Female. I live in San Diego, CA by myself in a condo with my kitty cat. Up until now my only real medical condition has been depression and asthma.
Over the last year or so my health has been deteriorating very rapidly.
I have pitting edema starting from around my knees down to my feet. The swelling is so bad that I cannot wear my shoes anymore and I have to step up to the next size.
I am also having a very hard time breathing and becoming short of breath after very minor activities (such as walking 100 ft). I have had to use my ProAir albuteral rescue inhaler way too much (20+ puRAB per day) and I always run out before I can refill the prescription.
I have also been very tired. I can easily (and do quite often) sleep the entire day. 1:00 AM till like 8:00 PM the next day no problem.
I must admit that I have gained a LOT of weight in the last year. This is mainly because of the lack of activity plus I have been eating only one meal a day and thats at around 11:00 PM where I run to the local fast food drive-thru and sometimes I will go to more than one! :dizzy:
I am very erabarrassed to talk about my weight but I need to get out of denial. So here goes. Last year at this time I weighed 210 lbs. Now I weigh 340 lbs and it just keeps increasing. Thats a BMI of like 47.
The extra weight has put so much strain on my joints, especially my back, that I am very sore and therefore constantly taking Advil.
The one "odd ball" thing that has been happening that doesn't seem to be related is my frequent urinating. I urinate least 10 times a day
Now here is some good news.
I went to a weight loss doctor here in San Diego. On my second visit he was concerned because my BMI went up (even though I have been on phentermine) and that I was having breathing difficulties. Before he would consider treating me (bypass surgery) he wanted to make sure that I was healthy enough so he referred me to a pulmonologist who also works in the Sleep Clinic.
The Pulmonary Doctor had me do 3 tests:
1. Echocardiogram
2. Pulmonary Function Test
3. Sleep Study
The echocardiogram showed NO problems with my heart (thank God!).
The Pulmonary Function Test showed no abnormal breathing issues other than my Asthma which we already knew I had.
The Sleep Study was a different story. He told me I had very bad Sleep Apnea and he prescribed for me a CPAP machine (pressure setting is 17 which I was told is very high so I must have pretty bad apnea). This machine actually helps me sleep at night I feel like I am getting more oxygen. My only complaint is the slight physical discomfort from wearing the facial mask.
So, my last visit with the pulmonologist was a bit strange because here I was complaining of severe breathing issues (which I do have, it really bothers me and I want to resolve it). I am telling the Dr. about my breathing issues but at the same time my test results have turned up "okay".
The pulmonologist next referred me to a cardiologist just to make sure and also to an asthma specialist to see if we can figure out if there is an external cause to my breathing difficulty. Those appointments are next week.
And that is where I stand.
One thing I would like to talk about, however, which complicates my situation a bit is I am very depressed. I have been hospitalized two times for suicidal ideation, the last visit was extremely severe to the point where I was given 6 treatments of ECT.
How does my depression relate to all this? Well, as I am sure you might have guessed being so overweight has a huge impact on my self esteem and my belief that happiness is no longer possible. I constantly think to myself that its all over. That turning 40 and gaining this weight is just a natural way of life and I cannot do anything about it. Well, if I was unable to be happy the first 40 years of my life I have NO IDEA how I am going to cope with the last 40.
So being as depressed as I am I don't leave the house to exercise. I just go to work and then come home and lie in bed.
I did buy a cheap stepper exercise machine that I started to use just to get my muscles some workout but I get very sore when I use it. It's like my leg muscles have completely atrophied.
I know I should be concerned but I don't know how to attack the problem. I cannot exercise outside because my depression keeps me indoors. I sleep all day on weekenRAB and evenings all other days.
I feel so damn stuck. I feel so damn confused. A lot of people look at obesity as the person's fault but I really feel like it has gotten the better of me and I have lost control. I wonder if I should go back to the psychiatric hospital and "fix" the mental issues which may help me get back outside and active again.
I feel like my doctors aren't on my side. They talk to me during appointments but I believe the medical doctors somehow think I am "making it all up" because of my mental history.
Please any advice, information, support, or just a friend would be so nice right now. I cannot let this continue the way it is because I believe that if I do suicide will feel like my only option. I don't want to do that because my Mother would not be able to handle it (we just lost my Dad last month).
Jan