Does anyone have a cook book recommendation for a retard like me?

[Moris]

I seriously need to learn how to cook but every time I look at the recipe and directions I get confused. There are a lot of ingredients that I have no idea what they are and the instructions tell me to do things that havent been previously explained. I have some Rachael Ray cookbooks but those are too advanced for me. I need a cookbook that's filled with recipes that no one can mess up because you're allowed to add anything to it that use ingredients that are the most basic of basic items and can be generalized like saying bread instead of something like pumpernickel bread. I have no idea what kind of bread that is or where I would even get it and because I don't know what bread that is, I don't know what kind of bread I could use to substitute it. These specific instructions frustrate me and I need a book that is very general and easy and idiot proof. I tried looking online but there's too many recipes to dig through and they are not categorized by difficulty which is what I'm more interested in. I'm looking to learn so organization by learning curve is important, as opposed to dish type or country of origin that the internet is usually categorized as. I don't care what I cook as long as I'm learning to cook.