Do you like my poems?

I'm going to publish them, but what do you think? (its not all of the poems)

1. Storm
Active,
Strong,
Wind
Bright,
Blinding,
Lightning
Loud,
Deafening,
Thunder
Dark,
Dangerous,
Clouds

2. Cliff Diving

I leaped,
My bare feet left the ground
Wind rushed through my hair,
I spread my arms out.
Seconds passed
then,
spikes
of coldness
against my body
my face then entered the
frozen
water
And i look down
Into the dark waters

3. Sunset

Reds,
And Oranges,
and Pinks
and purples

Dark Water,
Shimmers in the setting sun
Calm,
and peaceful

Simple Sand
with browns,
and blacks,
all miz\xed in with vanilla grains

The green leaves
On the coconut tree,
wave in the soft breeze
while the trunk holds strong and sturdy

These,
Are the pieces
to a perfect
Sunset
 
They are really good but you should try and vary them a little more. Try to write a few more that have longer sentences, a different rhythm, a different tone. Those ones are all very similar in structure.
 
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........|..........2 Pontos .....|||"|""\__
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