...Do I just need to discuss it and or vent? A few Questions I need

[G2008Williams]

answered by MEN & WOMEN please ? Hello everyone! Well first of all, I am happily married and have a wonderful husband, however, I have been having one particular thought which has been playing in the back of my mind.
A month before my husband and I tied the knot, it was a little stressful, since I was a few hundred miles away from him. I finally got to California, and I fell in love with him all over again, every little fight we had being so distant seemed to forgotten. However, in a nutshell, while we were a part, he had slept with another woman who continuously texted him while I was in his presence. I never thought anything of it, just assumed it was just a friend of his. We got married and she found out and became vivid! While my husband was at work, she called me explaining to me that he and her were intimate including orally. (Now, in order for a man to be orally sexual with a woman, does not he have to feel a certain way about the woman? - men please answer this question!) At the time I felt destroyed, then again I told myself I had to be strong for myself and the sake of my vows. I just can't see the situation from the outside in, but doesn't it seem like my husband took his vows under false pretenses? I think about it from time to time the fact he was with this woman and made contact like that with her. I won't lie, I was very jealous and I was very hurt. I have thought about Marriage counseling, but I don't think I am ready for that right now. Hopefully those who read this can comprehend how I feel about my situation.

For some reason, I feel the need to see what she looks like, what does that mean?

 

[unsung hero]

You don't sound happily married to me. Just because things were stressful does not give him the go card to cheat on you. You should have given him his walking papers. I would have.

 

[*carni*scrub*]

Its a natural thing to be jealous. have you tried talking to him? and is he still showing ne signs of continuing the actions? if he is then sorry hunny but hes a cheater and is probebly bored or scared. if hes not then maybe it was a mistake and only happen due to you not being there or being stressed. and just because he let her go down on him doesnt mean he had feelings for her men will let anything with a mouth do that! first i think talking to him (not accusing or making him feel bad about it) would be a good first step. then maybe try the counselor

 

[Patricia]

Your relationship is with your husband NOT her. You do not need to see her, know where she lives or anything else. Don't go there, it will eat you up.

I hope you told your husband that she phoned you, if not make it his priority to get her out of your life. I can see from what you have written that your becoming obsessed with HER.

Please step back and see what is really happening here. Your husband betrayed you, and she is still in your lives...do something about that!