Hi Michelle, that's how I started was with a doctor. I hurt my back jumping on my daughters trampoline. I was 42 at the time, shoulda known better (LOL). I went from never taking a pain pill in my life to 25 - 30 lortabs a day. I did a few oxy's but not much else. I was spending every penny we made on pills after my scripts ran out. My husband and one other person are the only 2 people that know anything about my addiciton. Up until 6 months ago I held down a 8 - 5 job in a customer service position for 13 years. My job was eliminated and I have collected unemployment since.
I don't think having a prescription for meth would be smart for me. If I had someone who could give them to me as prescribed to detox it may would work but I have no-one. The clinic has been a great help but they are breaking me. My counselor is a great guy but he doesn't have a clue what addicts are experiencing. He is young and needed a job. I think it takes a special kid of person to work in that position and it's hard when it pays so little. My family doctor helped me get to the place I am now by prescribing me anything I asked for and not even questioning me. I know I can't blame him but doesn't he need to carry a little of the blame? He is known in my little town as the one to go to for whatever you need. He has been in rehab several times him self. How could he even have a license and especially a right to write prescriptions!!
As I said, my husband doesn't have a clue about addiction and I think he would rather be blind than deal. It's been hard, after all we have been through he didn't even take the check book. I am still responsible for paying the bills and budgeting. It's not that he trusts me he just doesn't want to deal with the situation. I really dont think we would be together if it were not for my daughter and not being able to support 2 householRAB with the bankruptcy. But, as I said earlier, how can I blame him. He has worked his whole life to make a home for his family and have the things we have and I go and throw it all away. We were able to keep our home and cars since we filed chapter 13 but we are paying a BIG percentage of our income for the next 5 years.
I have read and reread posts (especially the recommendations on detoxing from home). I think they may be a big help. I am going to talk to my counselor on Thursday and start going down 7 1/2 a week and try to get off the meth. My parents will be here tomorrow for a 2 week visit from Tennessee. I want to tell my mom so bad but I am supposed to be the "good one" here, the child that never got in any trouble, with the perfect life.... I want so bad not to dissapoint them.
I know it has to be hard for both you and your husband. Especially with you having to go back to Opiates. I hope you both find help and thanks for listening!