Beef: :lol: I like you
Spun: You can't focus too much on the horrible things that can happen in life. If you want to be a paramedic to help those in need, then great. Whether it's a child molester, or a murderer or the next president of the United States you are helping, you just can't worry about that. If there is something wrong with the person you are saving, they will get what's coming to them in one way or another. But, you would be saving more lives that do some good in this world. Maybe it would be the next president of the United States and an actual good one. Or maybe it's someone who is in the middle of inventing something that will help eliminate pollution, or maybe it's the next teacher that would become every child's favorite teacher. You jsut don't know.
The point is, those people are in a better place. You are alive for a reason and you need to focus on the good you can do and not what you missed...however unfortunate your friends' lives were.
You hang in there! :hug2: