Dealing with people who just don't understand ...

[Missy7877]

For several years I've been dealing with my anxiety issues. I was diagnosed with social anxiety about 5 years ago. For the past year and half I've been in counseling ... as well as being on Paxil for 3 of the 5 years ( no longer ). Before I was diagnosed, I knew how I was feeling but didn't know there was an actual medical term for it. My family also saw something going on but caulked it up to me being " shy " and in some cases " unmotivated ". Now that I've been living with my diagnosis and trying to get better ... I still have family that just doesn't understand know matter how hard I try to explain it. I feel that I shouldn't have to explain ANYTHING to them ... it's not like it's my fault that I have this condition but atleast I'm trying to deal with it.

I also suffer from depression though I'm not sure which came first ... the anxiety from being depressed or my anxiety causing my depression. My therapist seems to think they go hand n hand. Regardless, it is a FRUSTRATING situation ... especially when I really really want to go to family events, ie. weddings, baby showers etc etc ... but get physically sick to my stomach when I try to. It's frustrating that I can't go into stores alone ... or that I go to the same gas station that is 10 miles out of the way just because I feel more comfortable there than using any closer to my house. It's frustrating looking for a new job ( the company I worked for closed ) and having to drive around the block a dozen or more times to talk myself into going into the building to hand them a resume or til there are only a few people there instead of multiple and sometimes just not going in at all because I physically can't make myself do it with the feelings I have.

Taking all the above into consideration, if I didn't know my situation ... I, too, might make some of the comments that SOME family makes towarRAB me. " Just get over it. " ... " You're too lazy. You're not motivated. " etc etc. I don't know how to make people understand that it's not that I WANT to be this way but that I can't help it ... atleast not right now.

Has anyone had similar experiences? How have those of you on the board dealt with this type of situation?

Thank you so much for any suggestions ... or just some understanding.

 

[valleylady]

i know the feeling as i suffer anxiety and depression and bad nerves to dont know how many times i have been out trying to avoid going to shops even thou there is things there that i have fanceid, and hate queing by the checkout 2 ,
i am on anti depressants but dont make a lot of diffrence as you say people just excpect you 2 get on with it easily said than done.
all the best to you.
valleylady

 

[Asteri00]

I completely know how you feel. My boyfriend (when I'm going through an episode of anxiety) says "Stop being a baby". I don't think people can understand what it is like to constantly be scared or even create things in your mind to be scared OF. I wouldn't wish anxiety on myworst enemy. I've become SEVERELY addicted to Xanax just to get my mind to stop for a second. What I've found out what works for a little bit is to watch TV (obviously something funny...King of Queens can get me out of my slump.) I wish you the best of luck and please know you're not alone. Message me if youwould like to speak more in depth about it.
:angel:

 

[ritualangst]

i can totally relate to everything you are saying ~ at first you can pass it off as "i don't really feel like doing anything tonite" and get away with that for awhile but sooner or later you have to go somewhere then "the feeling" starts ~ the fast hearbeat ~ the rushing to your head ~ feeling hot and uncomfortable ~ all of the sounRAB are amplified 1000 times louder than normal ~ you are talking but you feel like you are yelling at the person and so you don't want to talk anymore ~ you start shaking and you know you have got to get the heck out of there ~ no one gets it no one understanRAB but you do and i do and millions of other people do because we have anxiety and panic ~ we don't want anxiety and panic nor do we wish it on anyone else but if i hear "you'll be fine let's just go" one more time i will scream ~ i guess i'm lucky as i am older and it's much easier to say "no" but the few times i agree to go somewhere i instantly regret it and am home in 15 minutes ~ so sad what an awful way to spend your life ~ good luck and keep the faith ~

 

[Marinella]

Dear Missy,

I am really sorry to hear that you're family is not supporting you on this one but i am pretty sure that they love you very much, i dont know how old you are , but most parents they refuse sometimes to believe that something is wrong with their kid.., anxiety and depression it's not something easy to deal with on a dayly basis.., i also wonder why did you stop the medication if you still have this symptoms, i think you should see a pshychiatrist and have them put you on the right medication that will make you go through your day as a normal person and dont have to have the fear to go out of your confort zone., clonopin, and lexapro usually works very good together for depression and anxiety , it doesnt have to be a high doze , i'm sure the doctor will be able to tell how much to start you on , and yes i do know people that have this problem and the meRAB helped. Maybe someday you will try to figure out yourself before anyone else where the depression comes from , that usually coses the anxiety.., there is something on your subcouncious mind , some toughts that that you might not be aware of it and that can cause anxiety by itself...as your doctor said ..those two are related and it all depenRAB what couses it...let me know what you think about this ,

,

also keep in mind , your lifestyle it is very important, alcohol , cigarettes, coffeine...late nights , try to stay away from it..., read lots of good books , be spiritual ..that will make you stronger, believe that you can go through this...your mind is in control of you...unless there is more and i dont know it.
good luck and let me know if you want.