can't stop moving...please help

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livingalie

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I am new on here and this is the only thing to do at this point. I have 2 small children and a wonderful husband and I have been taking Ultram ER for about 4 years. I want to come off so badly...I AM coming off. My usual dose per day was about 600 mg, sometimes more, sometimes less. Yesterday evening, I only took 400 mg and tonight I only took 200 mg. I have been taking lexapro to balance out the effects of the mental stuff, and Flexeril to help with the muscular stuff. However, tonight, I cannot stop moving! I knew to kind of expect this, but it is driving me crazy. Does anyone know anything to do to get rid of this feeling. I can hardly sit here to type this without my arms killing me wanting to move. How long does this last during the tapering? By the way, to make it worse, no one knows I am going through this. My husband just thinks I don't feel well. I CANNOT tell him. I would be so erabarrassed. Does anyone have any other ideas on how to stop my body from wanting to jerk around and move?:
 
Hey livingalie,

I am glad you posted an update. It sounRAB like you are hanging in there and I was very pleased to read that!

I know what you are going thru is so hard... boy is it ever. I too understand when you say you CANNOT tell your husband. I never told mine either and it's something I do have guilt about. I know he would be supportive.. It's not that I don't give him that much credit.. It's that I am so ashamed. SO i completely undestand.. However, I KNOW the advice others are giving is right. I know I am wrong in keeping this addiction to myself.. I do think that it's REALLY important in the recovery process to be honest about my addiction.. It's the one thing I can't do and I am dissapointed in myself for not being able to do so. It's so much easier to give advice than follow it sometimes even though I know it would be the right thing to do and would also help ensure that I would not relapse.. i don't know.. It's something I struggle with and worry that if I could be honest with those close to me. it would only help...

The restlessness was the worst! I remeraber kicking thru the night.. I remeraber taking such hot baths I thought the water was so hot that I might burn myself!! It did help me calm my legs down a little bit... I remeraber not being able to sleep and how miserable I felt going to work while being in withdrawal.. It was a bad time.... BUT... IT GOT BETTER.

I see things a lot more clearly now... Yes, I still struggle but it seems to be getting better as the days go on.. I still crave the pills but I think in time that will get better too... I don't know.. I seem to really be rarabling now... hahhaha Something I tend to do from time to time..

I just wanted to say hello again and tell you I am praying for your strength and I hope with each passing minute... things get better.

Keep posting!
~Secrets
 
Hi There

Glad to see you posting. Good step. It is immensely helpful to be able to get it all out there. I have no doubt you are in a miserable way right now. That wasn't really a taper you did, but rather a pretty fast cold turkey withdrawal! Full withdrawals are not something we can hide from those in our families. The symptoms are hard and fast and, as you are experiencing, pretty debilitating.

There is a great post at the top of this board called Sample Home Detox. Read it. It has some very good suggestions to follow in withdrawal.

Young Mom, I have concern that you have jumped into withdrawal without a lot of forethought and knowledge. In kindness, I am going to suggest that you read a lot of posts on this board... go back pages and pages. Get an idea of what others experience and how symptoms are coped with by others.

I have two other pieces of advice for you.

First, get over the erabarrassment and share with Hubby. Don't sell him short. He can be your greatest ally in this and we all need live people to help us through. Think... if he were the one experiencing this, would you not want to be by his side to help him? This is what marriage is about. A partnership of caring and loving.

Second... get thee to a doctor! Sweetie, the story is so not new. We often torture ourselves by trying to hide the problem. So not necessary. The doctor will not judge... he willl help. I started with my family doctor. Together we worked out a plan to taper off first Oxycodone and then Xanax. I can not fully explain what a buurden was lifted when I finally really and truly sought help. The fear and erabarrassment totally dissapated and in its place was HOPE. And you know what? I am totally off those drugs now and have no desire for them. Was it rough. You bet ya. Was it possible to accomplish? Without a doubt.

The doctor might prescribe clonodine, a blood pressure med, that has helped many in withdrawal. Perhaps there are other suggestions he will have. The bottom line is that medical help is not only helpful, but I believe necessary. We are self prescibing when we cut ourselves off from any med and that is a dangerous habit. We can not play doctor to ourselves!

Please, start today with the brave step of telling hubby. Go together to a doctor. Be totally honest. Get the best help you can to have the best chance at restoring the body and mind and soul. Stop hiding from the problem... it is but a problem and of course you want it solved. It can be. Just like with any problem, approach it openly and honestly, seeking all the help needed to solve it... same as you would for any meraber of your family. You are equally deserving. Get started now.

With all hope
reach
 
livingalie Hi again. I just sent you a post a few minutes ago. I never read your first one. You don't need to tell me your story, I just read it. I am here for you just like everyone else. Post as often as you like, just don't give in please.

Take care of yourself Lyn
 
livingalie, I'm glad you're doing better and you posted again. I understand now why you don't tell your husband. If I told my wife I had detoxed and started taking Percocet (my monkey) behind her back, she would be livid with me. But, I also believe that she would understand that fighting the withdrawals is a battle that she never had to fight and how easy it is to start taking the pills again. She saw what I went through in my 50 hour hell and understanRAB somewhat about what I'm going through. But, then again she is a nurse and is used to taking care of people. Everybody's situation and marriage is different and you have to do what you think is right in your situation.

Continue to taper down. That is what I'm doing, instead of going cold turkey like I had planned. That's what my doctor told me to do, that's what the clinical personnel at the Substance Abuse center told me to do, as well as the people on this forum. I think it is good advice that we can both live by.

Good luck and keep us posted!
 
Try some Benadryl that should help a little with things. Over the counter sells it at 25mg/each pill. start with one and you can go up to 75 or 100 at a time. It may make you sleepy but then maybe that is a good thing as you withdraw...you probably feel like crap anyway so you might what to curl up and sleep for awhile. Withdrawals are never fun. You may need to go to the doctor and get something better. Good luck
 
I started to write you late last night when I had first signed up for this forum, but since I'm in worse shape than you right now and I have zero experience in any of this, I decided not to. I started and stopped my drug addiction recovery process twice now, but my wife and family all know my problem and all are supportive. When I do start the withdrawals, I will be able to count on them to help me through them.

reachout is absolutely right. Confide in your husband because you will need his support to break your addiction and especially during the withdrawals. Also, you didn't taper off - you nose-dived off! You need to taper off slowly - over weeks and maybe talk to a doctor about what is the right procedure. Every drug affects the body differently and the process to get off of them are different.

I hope this helped out.
 
P51 - I don't know. I broke at 50 hours and took my drug. The time period for everyone is different. I found the best thing to do it to taper down and not go cold turkey like I tried. That is what is working for me now. For someone else, they may be able to endure it better or have something to take the edge off and can detox all the way.

When walking seems to be the only thing that helps (for me) and your legs and back ache like you have the flu, it is hard to push though that stage once you hit it for the first time. Next time I will know to try something else other than walking to see if I can make it to the next stage.

Thanks!
 
Hello all. Thanks so much for all of the advice. I really cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. For those of you who don't know, my DOC is Ultram ER, and I was taking up to 800mg per day (4 200mg tabs per day). I went down to about 600mg for about a week, and then went down to 200mg. I was trying so hard not to take one last night, but I ended up having to. I also had taken flexeril and Tylenol PM. Not sure what finally made me fall asleep, but today has been pretty good. I have just been very sluggish.

I am sure that things are going to get tough for me again since I took that one. But, my thinking was that I did go off pretty cold turkey, and one tablet is much better than taking 3 or 4. Whether this will help or hurt in the long run, I am not sure.

I know what you guys are saying about telling my husband, but I can't do it. He would be so disappointed, so I have to do this on my own. I have to tough it out. I am determined to.

I took hot baths last night, and it did nothing for me except make me jerk around in water instead of out. As long as I was moving, I was fine, but as soon as I tried to sit still, I felt like my arms were going to explode. I had to continue to shake my arms and legs. I finally fell asleep, not sure how.

I am not getting the head zaps from discontinuing use of the Ultram ER, but I am taking Lexapro and I think that will keep me from getting them...can anyone tell me anything about this?

Anyway, I thank you all for being here for me. You guys are my shoulder to cry on right now. I CAN get through this, and I WILL. I have a lot to live for, and just have to keep reminding myself of that.

Please keep in touch, ya'll are helping me more than you know.

Livingalie
 
I am so stupid. I thought Ultram was "non narcotic". The doc and pharmacist both said so. I fly planes and didn't want anything to mess me up.Been on it for 6 months. Now after reading info on this site, I find out it's bad stuff. So, I went CT Thursday 1/22. I am f ing miserable. I just wanted to follow this thread and see how Y'all do. Didn't mean to hijack the thread.
 
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