Can an alcoholic ever drink moderately?

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Broad generalized statements like that bother me. Simply put, I did it. And I have alcoholism in my family.
I took a whole year off alcohol, and have managed to have the ocassional drink here or there without going off the deep end again. Honestly, I have no desire to ever get drunk again. And being sober for a year helped me to feel good that way in all sorts of social situations. It also helped me to recognize how alcohol feels, and to better understand how it alters my mood once I consume a drink or two. Further, not only has my relationship with alcohol changed, but my attitude toward it as well. I don't need alcohol, I enjoy it in slight moderation. The way it's supposed to be consumed. Now, I'm not saying I'm in the majority, absolutely not. But people like me exist. We've had a problem with alcohol which we were able to take control of that didn't mean obstaining from it all together, forever.

Taking a lot of time away from alcohol in whichever way works best for her may help to alter her relationship with alcohol. It's not a definite, but a possiblity.
 
I wouldn't say it's not possible for an alcoholic to drink moderately. Everyone is different. I'm just not sure why someone who's life has been disrupted to the level of being an alcoholic and believing themselves to be an alcoholic would never want to try.

A lot of addictions are "controllable" to a degree. I think that if your life is going well you are stronger in your resolve to stay in moderation. But it can change in a heartbeat.

It's a gray area. Some would argue that if you can quit drinking w/ no real problem you probably were not an alcoholic. Others believe that addictions can come and go in a person's life. I understand people in chronic pain having a hard time coping w/ how to use narcotic pills. I understand people who eat poorly trying to balance a food addiction w/ having to eat to stay alive. But, to me, alcohol is different. It's not necessary in your life. But if you've been down the path of trying to destroy yourself with drinking and get it under control, why take the chance of going there again? To me, alcohol still must have some sort of pull on you if you are taking that chance. But I'm completely honest in that I am not and have never been a drinker so it might be my ignorance of not understanding the root of what's driving this to begin with. But I'm pretty sure I'd not take the chance.
 
I'm sorry, but saying that an alcoholic has no control over the amount that they drink, and that in no way or means is able to go through life drinking in a moderate fashion like most people, is in no way a generalized statement at all. This is simply a fact that exists with alcoholics. You ask anyone in the field of substance abuse if there is anyway that an alcoholic or addict can follow some plan and be able to drink or use in moderation, and they will flatly and with no exception tell you, that no they can't, it just doesnt work. What you are telling her is bad advise and will seriously hurt someone that is an alcoholic because its exactly the type of thing they want to hear. It's essentially permission for them to drink which for an alcoholic is nothing more than a start of a very very ugly end. You go back and you read posts by others through this thread, and you'll see this is not my opinion, this is what experts in the field know and have found out over time and experience with addicts.

Simply put, moderation for an addict doesnt exist.

As to your situation, and why you might be able to drink in moderation, its likely because you arent an alcoholic at all to begin with. As you yourself probably know, one of the more common symptoms and effects of bi-polar disorder is perioRAB of substance abuse, including alcohol. This doesnt make that person an alcoholic even though they may experience and display symptoms that very closely mimic those of an alcoholic. This means that when you start adding any sort of psychological issues in with drugs and alcohol abuse (not necessarily addiction) you automatically throw out the general guidelines that would apply to an alcoholic, because you're not dealing with an alcoholic, you're dealing with someone with bi-polar disorder who could be an alcoholic, or could be suffering from a manic phase driving them to extreme binge drinking and/or drug abuse. So before anything else you'd have to differentiate between the two, and figure out what is what.

What I'm telling you is directly from what I've learned in taking abnormal psychology in college, talking to individuals suffering from bi-polar disorder (and other psychological issues), as well as my personal experience with people I know and knew who are addicts and alcoholics, including those who have had relapses, which is most of them. These relapses many times arent what you would think they would be for an alcoholic. A lot of people would think that these relapses would be extreme from the start, like someone going and buying a liter of vodka and downing the entire thing in one evening. Sure this happens but it's not always the case. Many times it starts off with someone having a beer, or a glass of wine, and what do ya know, they are perfectly fine, they have that one drink and stop, and its no problem for them. So from that one singular event they figure that everything is okay now, that alcoholism isnt a problem for them any more, and they can drink when they want to and just stop whenever they feel like. So the next time out they have their one one single drink again, and it's still fine. That may go on for a short bit of time, drinking just a little but, apparently in perfect control with absolutely no problems. Eventually though one time out, that perfect control, and that one drink limit are gonna be gone, and that one drink is going to turn into three, after all whats the harm, they're in control. Then after that, because they are in control, those three are gonna turn into seven, then the seven will turn into twelve, and that twelve are gonna turn into so much that they end up losing track they're drinking so much......but they are in control. This is just the type of thing that happens with addicts, and why its so hard for many addicts to stay clean. They figure that as long as they know that they have a problem they'll be able to control it, after all other people do, so why cant they........and right there is the trap they set for themselves and end up falling into face first.

There's a reason its called alcoholism, and not binge drinking....or self medicating, or compulsive drinking, It's because it's something different and far worse, something that is a disease, and if left untreated and allowed to continue will likely lead to any of the following....
Brain Damage - Severe GI Complications - Diseased Liver, Kidney, Pancreas, or Bladder - Heart Damage - Esophageal and Tracheal Damage - Increased Chance of Cancer in all areas - Genetic Damage(DNA) -Fetal Alcohol Syndrome(If Pregnant) - ......and a nuraber of other medical complications including likely death at an early age.
 
take it from an alcoholic, moderation will not work.

Definition of an alcoholic is someone who has lost the ability to control their drinking.
by definition an alco can't moderate! Heavy drinkers and problem drinkers could possibably do so.

interesting excert from the book by Milam & Ketcham "Under The Influence":
 
resolution09;

I agree with what you're saying, but there are some alcoholics, I would call them "mild alcoholics", whose lives are largely unaffected by their addiction. The only threat it poses to them is a health risk. Some alcoholics lead a perfectly normal and happy life, these are the ones I would say can learn to moderate their intake since they have no emotional attatchment to alcohol, it's more of a habit, see what I'm saying? Maybe they aren't alcoholics in the first place, just habitual heavy drinkers.
 
Please remeraber that different people have different opinions. Please state your views politely, and, if necessary, agree to disagree. :cool:
 
An alcoholic can never drink moderately. My life has been destroyed by having someone in my life who was an alcoholic. My husband of 43years died, he had been sober for 25 of those 43 years. He had perioRAB of being sober for many years at a time. He thought he could handle it in moderation, he died after being sober for years. He had cirrohis of the liver when he was in his thirites after drinking heavy for 15 years. He struggled all his life with this disease. At age 63 found he had a 1cm. lesion of the liver, it was malignant. When you have liver damage later on cancer can hit because of the scarring in the liver. I am at a period now that makes me sick. It took my husbanRAB life, it damaged my life-caused so much stress that I now have multibule auto immune illnesses--caused by stress from years of being with an alcoholic, who I loved dearly. So you can see alcohol had ruined both of our lives.
 
I'm mixed on this.

I think I'm an alcoholic. It's possible that I'm simply an alcohol ABUSER but not yet an alcoholic? But I fit the definition that AA has, and my mom and grandmother are alcoholics.

When I drink, I drink often and I ramp up my drinking from the light stuff to the harder stuff. I started drinking at 15- by 18 I was binge drinking where I'd start with beer, and within days be drinking hard liquor, getting drunk, and end up passing out, vomiting blood and sometimes blacking out. I quit drinking at 21 and started again at 28. From the time I was 28 to age 37, I got drunk TWICE (both miscalculations on how much I could drink, I wasn't trying to get drunk) and other than that drank nearly daily but never got drunk, and never drove after drinking. My tolerance to alcohol was significant, however, and it was not unusual for me to drink an entire bottle of wine in a couple of hours or to polish off a bottle of liqueur in a day or two. I never got drunk, but definitely was drinking too much. I quit drinking again in March of this year and have been alcohol free ever since, but I crave it daily.

So if you agree that I'm an alcoholic then I would say yes, it's possible for an alcoholic to drink in moderation because I did it for the last 10 years. I considered it "functional alcoholism" because it didn't impact my relationships or job and because I never had legal trouble over it. But I think you play with fire when you do it.
 
I think the thing people are arguing about here is the disease itself and it's diagnosis. There are many non-alcoholics that are told they are alcoholics by family, frienRAB and others. In my experience (I am not an alcoholic, but have had a LOT of exposure to some of the worst the disease has to offer in more than a few people) people who are "real" full-fledged alcoholics are going to be extremely hard pressed to ever have another drink without relapsing. Maybe there are people out there like this who can, but I certainly haven't met them.

The other form of "alcohol abuser" is someone who uses alcohol to self-medicate some other underlying condition or something else like that. I've known people who drank to within an inch of their lives due to depression or anxiety just to have that underlying condition treated and taken care of, and allowing them to have a drink once in awhile without completely binging again.

The problem is that a lot of people in the first category (Real alcoholics) have underlying conditions also.

My honest feeling is that if you've gone down the path where you can't stop drinking and recovered, don't tempt fate again. There are far more who can't ever stop than people who can.
 
I used to work with alcoholics and if they so much as had a little in some cough syrup or a little in an herbal supplement they usually ended up drinking again without control. I don't suggest a drop.
 
Based on my personal experiences with alcoholism, there is no way on God's Green Earth that an alcoholic can drink moderately, period. Perhaps a non alcoholic who has abused it for extended time perioRAB can ride this pony, but not an alcoholic.

Since the statistics can be so confusing and the expert advice and opinions so vague and varied, the best way for a person to determine if he is an abuser or an alcoholic is to honestly examine his thought processes regarding his drinking during perioRAB of abstinence. If during those time perioRAB a day (or hour) doesn't pass that he rationalizes reasons that it's "ok" for him to begin drinking again such as, "I haven't had a drink in a year, so I MUST not be an alcoholic", or "I was upset the last time that I got drunk, but this time I am happy so it will be different", or "I just won't get drunk, so it's okay for me just to drink a little", etc...........The list of excuses is infinite.

After he examines these thoughts, then he must realize that NON alcoholics don't wonder about these things and don't care if they have any alcohol or not. NON alcoholics don't seek answers from every known source known to man looking for the answer that they want to hear in order to not feel guilty about drinking. For non alcoholics, it's a non issue.:(
 
Hi

Alcoholism is a destructive disorder which can ruin a person's life as well as the lives of those around him. I agree wholeheartedly with Jayday's worRAB. All of them. If one were to follow your logic and experience, then is it safe to assume that a crack addict can learn to occasionally have a rock or two and learn to control the addiction? Or can an opiate addict occasionally have a few percocets and not have the addictive thoughts kick in again?

I don't disbelieve that you are now drinking again and controlling it at this point. Anything is possible. I guess what I would question is the motive. What would be so important about having a drink that one would chance the strong, strong possibility of a relaspse? In true recovery, an addict's strongest defense is abstinence. It is a life wthout the possibility of playing with fire. It is the conviction that the addiction is so painful and hurtful that we want to do nothing to jeopordize our sobriety.

For me, posting on an addiction and recovery board is an affirmation that I never want to go back to where I was. Like you, my attitude and relationship concerning my addiction has also changed. My change is recognition that I do not need or want or desire any substance that in any way alters me even slightly. There is just no place in my life for it.

I hope that your path in life continues to work for you. As for me, I will continue to be an advocate of addicts finding recovery through consistent abstinence and strict adherance to a sober thinking life.

Peace
reach
 
I think it depenRAB on the medical definition of alcoholic. I think someone who has become physically dependent on alcohol that moderation probably does not work. However; I have known abusers who can become moderate drinkers. My husband and his father are examples. My husband had a huge drinking problem after he was divorced the first time. His wife accused him of being an alcoholic. He spent the next few years drinking every night. It took a few tries, but he ended up stopping because he was sick of the hangovers. He now drinks occasionally during social events or sometimes after a stressful day. He drinks probably six or or seven times a year. He does say that sometimes he cannot stop once he starts, but that is that night. He has no problem abstaining the next day.
 
reachout;

I would disagree, I would say it is possible for an alcoholic to learn enough control to stick to normal consumption reccomendations (ie. no more than 4 daily units in the UK) depending on the severity of their addiction. There is obviously a point of no return in every case, but I'm fairly sure if the addiction is brought under control at an early enough stage, the sufferer can definitely revert to normal drinking habits and lead a normal life, enjoying alcohol in the same limits a non-alcoholic would. There would be a higher risk of relapse, but I think it could be done.
 
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