Black Night Sky

S

Slam

New member
Upon bearing this sincere
passion under night skies
so clear, I'll encompass
the paradox of my
ideas. Under a fervent
dedication or analytical
depravity. Then cotton
ball clouRAB envelop
the sky and I'll hope
upon hopes that
the prodigal sun
should bless with
bounty this irreverent
Earth. As I turn,
my thoughts yearn
for an urn to discard
their jaded restlessness
or a tomb to assume their
corpse to repose.
'Neath the lid I'll find fitting the basin.
I'll find the sublime slumber of innocence.
Should I wake to sun's light in my face
will you pledge my sleep to replace
like darkness in the sun's wake.
 
parts of it seem too wordy, as if the adjectives don't belong there or there would of been a better way, a more fluid way of getting his point across.

I digress since this person was banned and there is no point in talking about if he can't answer back. =(
 
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