S
Strange
Guest
http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/fluffy160/254312/
It's one of my first pieces. I wrote it a year ago, when I was 12, and haven't edited it much since then. Even though it was written by a 12-year-old and a beginner, I want you to be honest with your criticism. Don't hold back. I can take it, and I won't take it personally.
Leroy and Carter are cliche. I'd like some advice on how to make them better...
I know the ending is complete crap. I got lazy: there wasn't anything left to say. What should you do about that?
Also, what do you think of the writing style? I think the writing style kind of changed. At the beginning and middle, it was very heavy and detailed, and at the end, it was more relaxed. Which do you prefer? I found both styles awkward, personally, but that's just because I always feel strange about writing.
Instead of trying to improve this story, do you think I should toss it and go on to better things? I know it's crap, but is it worth fixing, or is it hopeless?
It's one of my first pieces. I wrote it a year ago, when I was 12, and haven't edited it much since then. Even though it was written by a 12-year-old and a beginner, I want you to be honest with your criticism. Don't hold back. I can take it, and I won't take it personally.
Leroy and Carter are cliche. I'd like some advice on how to make them better...
I know the ending is complete crap. I got lazy: there wasn't anything left to say. What should you do about that?
Also, what do you think of the writing style? I think the writing style kind of changed. At the beginning and middle, it was very heavy and detailed, and at the end, it was more relaxed. Which do you prefer? I found both styles awkward, personally, but that's just because I always feel strange about writing.
Instead of trying to improve this story, do you think I should toss it and go on to better things? I know it's crap, but is it worth fixing, or is it hopeless?