Wives:
My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
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My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
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A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
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I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor."
I asked her, "Where's the car?"
She replied, "In the lake."
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The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
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I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.
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My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.
So I got myself two girlfriends.
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Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
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A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
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A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters..
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
Guys and Gals:
IT IS ALWAYS GUYS WHO ARE ROMANTIC! AND GIRLS ALWAYS PUT THEM DOWN!!!
HE *: I'm a photographer.i've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE :*I'm a plastic surgeon.i've been looking for a face like yours!!!
HE *: Hi!didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?
SHE :*Must've been once.i never make the same mistake twice!!!
HE *: May i have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE :*No,i'd like to have some pleasure too!!!
HE *: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE :*I must've been given your share!!!
HE *: Is it hot in here or is it *just you?
SHE :*It's hot!!!
HE *: I'd go to the ends of the world for you!
SHE :*Okay,but would you stay there?
HE *: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE :*Sorry! i'm having a headache this weekend!!!
HE *: Your face must turn a few heads!
SHE :*And your face must turn a few stomachs!!!
HE *: Go on ,don't be shy.Ask me out!
SHE :*Okay,get out!!!
HE *: I think i could make you very happy
SHE :*Why, are you leaving?
HE *: What would you say if i asked u to marry me?
SHE :*Nothing. i can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!
HE *: Can i have your name?
SHE :*why,don't you already have one?
HE :*Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!!!
HE :*Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
SHE: Nah,it was plain bad luck!!!
