Emma Bennet
New member
after dating two amazing men over the past 3 months, both forming really positive mental/emotional/physical connections (though both quite different in each way - Guy 1, 15yr+ age gap, sharing a similar energy and sense of humour; and Guy 2, 5yr+ age gap, sharing a similar curiosity about the world and interests), I found myself in a tricky situation..
Basically, Guy 1 found out i was dating Guy 2 - which wouldn't a problem with him, save for the fact that he often sees Guy 2 at the same places he likes to go to; so naturally they know each other a little. Knowing this, he felt uncomfortable knowing i was seeing someone he knew, and asked that i either stop seeing him, or stop seeing this other man. Interestingly enough, he is comfortable with the idea of me dating other people whilst we continue to get to know each other more, and i got the impression that he planned to do that same. He said that he wanted me to stay with him because of our growing connection, but ultimately would be accepting of whatever choice i made..
After this conversation, i talked to Guy 2 and told him about about Guy 1. He was not concerned about me seeing Guy 1, though found it a little surprising; he also let me know that he wants to continue to build our relationship, and that he would like to discuss it more in detail in future; he has told me that he does have a connection with another girl, however hasn't seen her recently from what i gather.. sometimes this guy clashes with me as far as humour and energy goes, but he is very caring (not that Guy 1 isnt..) and i feel like we could build on that connection...
I felt very uncomfortable being given an ultimatum by Guy 1, being asked to break things off with Guy 2 when we have a good energy between us, as i had planned on letting things continue with both of them for a few more weeks then deciding upon a decision... but confronted with the issue, i made a choice.. as i have felt a slight lack of emotion from Guy 1, though comes with time doesnt it, and uneasy about him setting my choice in motion, i decided to chose Guy 2..
I cant help feeling like i've made a mistake, breaking off things completely with one awesome person for no real reason save a slight defensiveness - though im not really in a good position to judge the situation lol.. but then i must. Perhaps it is, perhaps it isnt; i think i wanted instinctively to be with the more open and in a sense 'logical' of the two... but part of me feels uneasy about my choice, as does Guy 1 (quote, "i think you made a mistake"- found that comment a bit too... i dont know... i mean, it was my choice, and he said he would respect it; cant help but wonder why he said it, when he had already expressed he wanted to be with me... guilt-trip maybe?...knowledge of my character?)... Funnily enough, neither guys seems to like the other very much or get along very well...so im finding it intriguing that i got along with both this well..
What do you all think?
was i being selfish in wanting to simply let things play out for a little longer? i feel like i could be happy with either of them.. saying that, i am happy knowing i will be seeing Guy 2 in the future 
very happy hehe.. But also sad i wont be seeing Guy 1, at all; tears and tissues took up today. Time will tell, and i'll learn from this whatever the outcome.
Help....? sorry this seems more like a blog post than a question
(if it makes a difference, im in my very late teens)
- im really not. when i met these people i didnt know their ages, their careers, anything; i base my relationships upon emotion and follow my instict, often at the expense of logic/emotion. i dont base my choices on cash. sorry if you have had bad experiences in the past
Basically, Guy 1 found out i was dating Guy 2 - which wouldn't a problem with him, save for the fact that he often sees Guy 2 at the same places he likes to go to; so naturally they know each other a little. Knowing this, he felt uncomfortable knowing i was seeing someone he knew, and asked that i either stop seeing him, or stop seeing this other man. Interestingly enough, he is comfortable with the idea of me dating other people whilst we continue to get to know each other more, and i got the impression that he planned to do that same. He said that he wanted me to stay with him because of our growing connection, but ultimately would be accepting of whatever choice i made..
After this conversation, i talked to Guy 2 and told him about about Guy 1. He was not concerned about me seeing Guy 1, though found it a little surprising; he also let me know that he wants to continue to build our relationship, and that he would like to discuss it more in detail in future; he has told me that he does have a connection with another girl, however hasn't seen her recently from what i gather.. sometimes this guy clashes with me as far as humour and energy goes, but he is very caring (not that Guy 1 isnt..) and i feel like we could build on that connection...
I felt very uncomfortable being given an ultimatum by Guy 1, being asked to break things off with Guy 2 when we have a good energy between us, as i had planned on letting things continue with both of them for a few more weeks then deciding upon a decision... but confronted with the issue, i made a choice.. as i have felt a slight lack of emotion from Guy 1, though comes with time doesnt it, and uneasy about him setting my choice in motion, i decided to chose Guy 2..
I cant help feeling like i've made a mistake, breaking off things completely with one awesome person for no real reason save a slight defensiveness - though im not really in a good position to judge the situation lol.. but then i must. Perhaps it is, perhaps it isnt; i think i wanted instinctively to be with the more open and in a sense 'logical' of the two... but part of me feels uneasy about my choice, as does Guy 1 (quote, "i think you made a mistake"- found that comment a bit too... i dont know... i mean, it was my choice, and he said he would respect it; cant help but wonder why he said it, when he had already expressed he wanted to be with me... guilt-trip maybe?...knowledge of my character?)... Funnily enough, neither guys seems to like the other very much or get along very well...so im finding it intriguing that i got along with both this well..
What do you all think?
was i being selfish in wanting to simply let things play out for a little longer? i feel like i could be happy with either of them.. saying that, i am happy knowing i will be seeing Guy 2 in the future very happy hehe.. But also sad i wont be seeing Guy 1, at all; tears and tissues took up today. Time will tell, and i'll learn from this whatever the outcome.Help....? sorry this seems more like a blog post than a question
(if it makes a difference, im in my very late teens)
- im really not. when i met these people i didnt know their ages, their careers, anything; i base my relationships upon emotion and follow my instict, often at the expense of logic/emotion. i dont base my choices on cash. sorry if you have had bad experiences in the past