A
aa889d
Guest
...OK rant over - here's the bare facts.... what would YOU do ? Married 12 yrs - 2 kids, youngest is a little over a year old....
Little to NO intimacy for past 2 years solid. Maybe 1x / mo max. When it happens its with the lights off, missionary, vanilla. I try to take my time, last two times tried to go "downtown", was told not to and asked to "hurry up" on one occasion.
I have suggested counselling - No.
I have bought 3 relationship books, she has not read them / too tired to read them. Her own mother gave her a copy of "Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura - she supposedly read it, but has not put anything into practice.
Always, too tired, kids took too much energy, etc.... She gets mad when I volunteer to help with extracurcicular activites (older kid)because I didn't "check" with her to make sure it was OK. She is no longer interested in going to church.
She makes gestures of love - bottom line great mother, losy wife. Got nice V-Days present both give and received... no loving that night - she fell asleep.
She FINALLY went to doctor for fatigue, hormones, wt loss.... was told she is starting MENOPAUSE ?!?! She's not even 40 yet. Its like a celibate marriage with chronic PMS.
What (if anything) could you or would you do ? I'm seriously thinking about talking with an attorney to find out what I'd be in for and start weighing the options of leaving. If we didn't have 2 kids - hell I'd been gone a long time ago...
I won't cheat- I'll leave first. Guess if I have to be the *sshole in the situation in order to affect a change, that's how it has to be. She went off last weekend for 4 days, I took care of the kids - yeah they're busy, but its not ovewhelming like she'd have me believe. I went out of town for a weekend - I get a call from her to tell me the baby is getting sick (guilt trip for going).....
I help w/ housework, work 40+ hrs a week, she works 2 days (kids in school and daycare).
I have a knot at the end of the rope, but the grip is slipping ......
What to do ?
Little to NO intimacy for past 2 years solid. Maybe 1x / mo max. When it happens its with the lights off, missionary, vanilla. I try to take my time, last two times tried to go "downtown", was told not to and asked to "hurry up" on one occasion.
I have suggested counselling - No.
I have bought 3 relationship books, she has not read them / too tired to read them. Her own mother gave her a copy of "Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura - she supposedly read it, but has not put anything into practice.
Always, too tired, kids took too much energy, etc.... She gets mad when I volunteer to help with extracurcicular activites (older kid)because I didn't "check" with her to make sure it was OK. She is no longer interested in going to church.
She makes gestures of love - bottom line great mother, losy wife. Got nice V-Days present both give and received... no loving that night - she fell asleep.
She FINALLY went to doctor for fatigue, hormones, wt loss.... was told she is starting MENOPAUSE ?!?! She's not even 40 yet. Its like a celibate marriage with chronic PMS.
What (if anything) could you or would you do ? I'm seriously thinking about talking with an attorney to find out what I'd be in for and start weighing the options of leaving. If we didn't have 2 kids - hell I'd been gone a long time ago...
I won't cheat- I'll leave first. Guess if I have to be the *sshole in the situation in order to affect a change, that's how it has to be. She went off last weekend for 4 days, I took care of the kids - yeah they're busy, but its not ovewhelming like she'd have me believe. I went out of town for a weekend - I get a call from her to tell me the baby is getting sick (guilt trip for going).....
I help w/ housework, work 40+ hrs a week, she works 2 days (kids in school and daycare).
I have a knot at the end of the rope, but the grip is slipping ......
What to do ?