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Maybe a connector in the wiring system has come loose. Try wiggling anything you can see while watching the gauges.

I don't know why they do it either, but if you need someone to deliver the "on site smacking" I'll gladly volunteer =)

"idiot kid" gives a great start. I would add that you should concentrate on your local media outlets first: television, radio, newspaper. Contact the news editors and/or individual reporters directly by phone/email and see if they're interested.

Go to the dealer and get a new turn signal relay. I shouldn't be much money.

What I have done is to scope everything out in these local stores and then find the exact same thing online for a much lower price.