Sorry, but the bride has every right to choose her closest friends to be her bridesmaids and is not obligated to choose your daughter as one. Your daughter will be in the family photos.
It varies a lot depending on the bride's relationship with the groom's mother, the groom's mother's interest in doing wedding planning with the bride, whether the groom's family is contributing the traditional parts like the rehearsal dinner and transportation, and whether the groom's family has...